Home Depot and high fashion eloped...

Every woman has at least one man in her life that is super into tools, fixing cars, being a man's man, and one who totally doesn't understand fashion, especially shoes. Be it her father, brother, best friend growing up, uncle, grandfather, boyfriend, boss, or chronic you-know-you-shouldn't-but-you-can't-help-it hook up, these men just don't understand shoes. They can't comprehend why we would spend perfectly good money on something that we wear on our feet.

What they don't understand is the joy that we get when we see a fabulous sky-high heel in our size and, cross your fingers, on sale, its the same joy that they get when they see that new drill set they've been ogling for months.

But, what happens when these two polar opposite passions collide? A supremely beautiful piece of footwear, of course! Meet the Proenza Schouler Bracket heel:


Photo provided by Zappos.com

They are both architecturally and aesthetically beautiful. That's real hardware ladies! That combined with the creamy ribbed patent leather, peep toe, and scroll detail makes it a must-have shoe. It's definitely a statement shoe. So you can brag to that clueless male of yours that your shoes have the highest of the high-end bolts, much better than those rinky dink little bolts from the Home Depot on the corner. AND Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor put them together special for you. Ok, maybe Mr. Taylor really didn't put them together for you, but with these types of men, you really have to wow them. Who knows, maybe that 4" hardware heel will catch the attention of your gent and he might even appreciate them as art, rough, manly (super amazingly delectable), gruff - art.

Even better, once you slip these babies on maybe you'll feel like hammering or sawing something... or not.

'80s Dominatrix Barbie

Imagine a Barbie doll with big teased hair, innocent doe eyes, a whip in one hand and fresh baked cookies in the other, a big unassuming smile, shoulder pads, leggings, and hot shoes. She is fun, flirty, and sexy with a little side of raunchy underneath.

That is the image I get when I see the alluring Fendi Color Block Patent Platform


Photo provided by: www.BergdorfGoodman.com

With this knockout of a shoe, I'd feel uber-sexy without feeling slutty. I adore the hot pink pop of color juxtaposed against the black. The criss-cross of the leather straps gives enough detail to make it interesting, but thankfully not overly complicated. I know the 4.75" heel will make calves everywhere look toned and sultry. But, interestingly enough what really drew me to this shoe is the deviation from the newly popular peep-toe. Instead Fendi decided to take a risk and go with the straight-up open toe. It's perfection.

You know you want to see what this foxy pair looks like with a big wave bang and some black lace fingerless gloves.

Slinky Gone Sexy

What walks down stairs, alone or in pairs, and makes a slinkity sound? A spring, a spring, a marvelous thing! Everyone knows it's Slinky. It's Slinky, it's Slinky, it's fun, it's a wonderful toy. It's Slinky, it's Slinky, it's fun, it's a wonderful toy. It's fun for a girl or a boy. I can't help but sing the nostalgic Slinky tune when I see the fantastic portrayal of beauty also known as the Alexander McQueen Black Twist Bootie

Photo provided by: www.AlexanderMcQueen.com

These are so much fun to look at that I'm jazzed to see how fun they are to wear! Can you imagine how phenomenal these will make your feet and legs look? The 4.5" heel coupled with the silver and black twisted detail is sure to bring well-deserved attention to your feet, the twists will give the illusion of a sexy arch; so make sure to schedule your TropiCabana Colada pedicure now. What's more is that the stretchy slingback will make these magnificent beauties comfortable to wear all night long while you flirt the night away and gloat about how many stairs your Slinky used to walk down without stopping.

Mine went down the entire Empire State Building's stairwell. Beat that.

Shoe versus Rock

Anyone who has seen the Sex and the City movie knows the engagement shoe. That beautiful blue Manolo that sparkles under the light, it's unbelievably gorgeous. The scene where Big proposes to Carrie in that AH-mazing closet (I'm crossing my fingers for a closet like that) is like a fantasy to many women, at least many fashionista women. But, that scene begs the question, would you rather a diamond accompany a proposal or a shoe?

Let's take first the Manolo Blahnik Something Blue Satin Pump

Photo provided by: www.NeimanMarcus.com

The striking blue color grabs your attention first, but what keeps your eyes fixated and a bit dazed is the dazzling crystal broach. The 4.25" heel will keep your legs looking long and lean. Paired with a healthy tan, this shoe might even spark a proposal! (Fun Fact: In the movie, Carrie mentions that her pair had cost her around $500... but these really cost just under $1,000. Next time I'm at Neiman Marcus I'm going to ask for the Carrie Bradshaw discount and see what happens!)

Now, think about your dream engagement ring. Go ahead, take your time, I can wait. I could ponder that gorgeous rock for hours if someone let me. Ok, have that image in your head now? See it on your finger? Fun, right?! In SATC, Carrie didn't choose an engagement ring, she technically chose an engagement closet (yum!) and then got that plus an engagement shoe. Would that be a viable option for you?

Would you choose a shoe over a rock?

Tie Yo Shoe

Menswear + Sheer + Oxford + Heel = Hot Hot Hot!

I present to you the Christian Dior Platform Bootie

Photo provided by: www.BergdorfGoodman.com

It's the perfect shoe for the office! Understated, yet glamorous. An Oxford, yet still a fabulous heel. Covered up, yet still sexy as hell. As if the chocolate-colored leather and the peep toe didn't do it for you, the mesh and the 3.5" heel should! This fun piece of footwear is fun to walk in and it breathes to boot! (Pun very much intended!) Plus, this shoe can go with pretty much any outfit - a down-to-business pair of slacks, a fitted pencil skirt, or even some fun and flirty opaque tights would go together wonderfully!

Birthday Shoes!

There is no way that I am going to start a shoe blog and not include my birthday shoes. That would be a humongous tragedy; so huge that my lovely heels would be personally offended and walk out of my closet. Then I would be ridiculously sad and grieve by wearing flats for the rest of my life (perish the thought!)

These heels are the pride and joy of my closet. They are the pair that bring the largest smile to my face (and took the largest chunk of change from my wallet.) I wear them as often as possible without looking like I only own one pair of shoes.

Here's the back-story on my babies: In September of last year I was browsing the Nordstrom shoe department online as I normally do trying to discover my next new purchase. I wasn't really finding anything fun or eye-catching and slowly losing hope, until I came across one of the most beautiful pairs of shoes I'd ever laid my eyes on. I don't even know how to describe the feeling I had when I first saw them. It wasn't true unconditional love or cupid's arrow, because that borders on creepy and inappropriate, but it's as though something clicked. I had to have them, no questions.

Well, I don't know about most 22-year old women fresh out of college, but I do know that I'm not really in a financial place to purchase shoes close to $400. Regardless, nothing was stopping me from owning them, nothing. I decided then and there that I would save for one month (cutting back on eating out, shopping, pretty much anything fun... I was pretty cranky that month!) then purchase the pair of unbelievably gorgeous heels for myself for my birthday in October. Yup, that's how I justified it to myself... it was a birthday present - to myself. To Jess, with love from Jess. Bad idea? No. Ridiculous? Maybe. Best decision ever? Absolutely yes!!

Finally after a month of blah-ness, the time finally came for me to go to the store and come home with fabulous new footwear. I remember it like it was yesterday... seriously (don't judge). I walked into Nordstrom with a purpose, there was no lollygagging, no browsing, none of that. I even put my phone on silent. I was on a mission. I walked straight to the mecca that is the shoe department and beelined it to the nearest available salesperson. His name was Earren, he was very nice, handsome and he had no idea what he was getting into with me. I held out my hand, introduced myself and let him know exactly what I was in the market for. Here's how the conversation played out:

Me: Hi, I'm Jessica how are you?

Guy: Hi Jessica, I'm Earren: How may I assist you this evening?

Me: I need the Stuart Weitzman Puente in size 8.5 or 9.

Guy: Oh, I'm sorry to tell you that we are sold out.

This is where I'm immediately the saddest girl in the whole store and immediately trying to think of other stores that may carry the shoe.

Me: That stinks. I can't believe they sold out so quickly!

Guy: That's a joke, I just wanted to see the look on your face.

Me: Haha funny man, I need that shoe.

He goes into the back where I believe shoe elves just make shoes all day and night and comes back out empty handed. I'm again instantly sad and have a confused look on my face.

Guy: Ma'am, I'm sorry but we don't have either size.

Me: I'm so sad right now.

Guy: Just kidding! I have an 8.5 for you to try.

Now, I'm always down for a fun time, a good joke, whatever. But this isn't funny. This is SHOES. This is serious business. While I tried on the shoes we made conversation, admired the beautiful heels and rung me up. PS - I didn't get a special birthday discount, which I'm still bitter about to this day. Even though it doesn't happen, I thought it was going to be like a movie where I got everything free that day or something. Don't ask.

With all of that out of the way, without further ado, I'd like to present to you my birthday shoe, the Stuart Weitzman Puente heel.

Photo provided by http://stuartweitzman.zappos.com

I feel like singing when I pull these out of my closet. They are so amazing to look at and so comfortable to wear, it's unbelievable. What is there not to love about this shoe? Black suede with red patent leather? The hidden platform? The peep-toe? The red rigatoni-shaped detailing? The leather lining? The patent covered 4.75" heel? Everything about this pair of heels is wonderful, delightful, and any other positive adjective that I can't currently think of because it's late on a Sunday night.

These, ladies and gentlemen, are my birthday shoes. Enjoy!

Create unabashed envy.

Take a moment to sit back and imagine this - Walking through a crowded corridor of fashionable, beautiful people, they part like the Red Sea with awe and amazement on each of their faces as you strut your gorgeous self by. Even the nasty wenches of the world step aside reluctantly, trying to hide their invidious looks with their fake smiles.

Sounds pretty good? Downright delectable to me! That is where my imagination wanders off to when I think about displaying the new Yves Saint Laurent Black Patent Cage Boots on my feet.


Photo provided by SeventhAvenueAustralia.Blogspot.com

This screams "Don't-mess-with-me-I'm-a-badass-bitch-and-will-step-on-you". Now, don't get me wrong, I realize that this is not the prettiest piece of footwear. I'm not saying it is. What I'm saying, is, that women everywhere need to know what it feels like to wear this shoe. To own it - not in the literal sense, but in the figurative sense.

The entire design of the shoe is alluring and deviously appealing. The laser-sculpted 4" heel is unparalleled by any other heel this season. But don't flinch from imaginary pain just yet, only the heel is made of metal. The rest of it is exquisite black patent leather which actually has been found to make the boot quite comfy! Crazy, I know it! I adore how the intricate, woven look keeps consistent throughout the entire shoe.

Even if you don't buy it, go try it. Like I said, every woman deserves to "own" this shoe.

Size 39 please, thank you!

Don't get it twisted!

Actually, DO get it twisted.

Whilst (haha, Maryl!) perusing this month's Harper's Bazaar I came across an Oscar de la Renta ad that caught my eye with it's pretty spring colors. What held my attention (for an embarassingly long time, mind you - I called some fashionista friends and ripped out the ad to show my mom) were the divine heels displayed on the models feet.

Let's drool over the new Oscar de la Renta Peep Toe Soft Pleat Pumps, shall we?

Photo provided by OscardelaRenta.com

These heels are so gorgeous they make me want to start a slow clap and gradually have numerous people around me join in and applaud it's unfair beauty. Where do I even start? Ah yes, that heel. That unique, twisted 4.25" heel gives it a whimsical quality that's always fun in a shoe. The contrasting colors (red and white) and textures (patent leather and straw) are show-stopping yet modest all at once.

Being able to wear this shoe would be better than relaxing in a luxurious bubble bath, a glass of wine in one hand, your favorite book in the other, all the while a beautiful man making you dinner and waiting on you hand and foot. That's one hell of a shoe.

The Oscar de la Renta Spring 2009 line is stunning as a whole, you should check it out, but this pair definitely stands out above the rest.

I have a major shoe issue...

I love shoes, the end. Well, not "the end". I heart shoes. More specifically - heels. Beautiful, gorgeous, can't-live-without-them heels. Stilettos, sling-backs, gladiators, booties, peep-toes... name it, I love it. Fabulous footwear has a way of bringing an even bigger smile to my face.

Rather than email my girlfriends my new obsessions every other day, I'll start to post my favorite foot ornaments for the world (or my friends and the three random people that will stumble upon this blog) to drool over them with me.

Today's delicious desire - The Dillian Flower Pump by Christian Louboutin

 

Image provided by 55SecretStreet.com

My first glimpse of this amazing piece of art was in the Britney Spears video for "If You Seek Amy". The video is blurred so you can barely see what the shoe really looks like, but it was just so unbelievably gorgeous (even in that hazy view) that I fanatically Googled until I found it. Alas, I'm completely unable to afford them but I ogle them constantly, completely tempted to click "Add to Cart".

This pair is gorgeous, you must admit. Who wouldn't love to look down and see that fabulous red flower looking back at you? These make my heart happy, and they aren't even in my closet. That's real shoe beauty.